A beautiful Non-Productivity

Starting yesterday morning, this extremely unfamiliar but very welcome deep calm has settled in. I say settled, but it is a little unsettling in its newness. I laid down to meditate for 10 minutes yesterday and over an hour passed without my noticing the time. I sat at my computer to be productive and chose instead to wander aimlessly about the house adjusting little details. I pulled into my driveway from errands, turned off the engine, and felt no desire to ambulate for many minutes. I had an intention to create some art, but found a truth that I could summon the beneficial feelings of that practice without actually getting out the supplies.

I can see how some of the mystics get so unkempt, seriously. It’s a quiet that is more than my mouth not moving. I’m having stretches of no mind, no ego, no desire, even no desire for movement because this moment is so engaging. And then this moment and then look here is yet another that is so worthy of my full presence.

So, my wish at this moment is that someone will please tell me what this is called? I know it is a normal part of the process, but I need some context, lest I allow myself to fear the pull of drifting completely into stillness that won’t serve my basic needs like work and food and child care.


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